Poem: We Became One

This poem was inspired by a dream I had two nights ago. It wasn't a pleasant dream as it was giving me a look into my past of about seven years ago while going to undergraduate school in Detroit. I never wanted to know Detroit but I went to undergraduate school there because it was close to home and was more affordable. I don't like big cities and find that being Native in big cities is very challenging. This poem is also about the experiences of my family and relatives in the urban environment. Additionally, this poem was inspired by how annoying a lot of new age stuff is in becoming one with the world. I wish people would open up their eyes to the pain and suffering that takes place all around them instead of believing everything is peace and love. I find that these people claiming peace and love need to step outside of their privileged little box and see whats going on in the rest of the world.

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We became one with cigarette butts on the ground,
In our pocket,
In our ashtray,
We became one with trash lining curbs of city streets,
We became one with the smoke from the incinerator,
One with the haze,
One with the particulate matter,
We became one with the club lights,
The misogyny,
The dripping sounds,
We became one with car exhaust,
Dashboards we hit in anger,
Windshields cracked,
We became one with a fragmented city,
One with empty lots,
Broken windows,
Broken cords,
We had to much to drink,
To be with a crowd,
In a crowd,
Invisible in a crowd,
Bowling alley fries,
Ringing in the ears,
We stand too close in front of the speakers,
We became one with loving the land,
In an environmentally unconscious city,
Being chased for miles in our car,
Because we shook our head at someone who littered,
And they hated the land we tried to love,
We became one in urban people treating us a third rate,
We became one in being the only Native student on campus during the night classes,
Driving home,
Must lay down on the cool grass,
We became one as the world spiraled onto the floors of our homes,
Tumbled into the arms of our families,
We became one with internalized oppression,
Having no outlet with unknown twists and turns,
We became one with the feeling of emptiness that the city gave us daily,
Shocked because of car jackings,
Visible city wounds,
Metaphors for our soul,
Inside yearning for culture,
We became one with seeking,
Retiring the demons,
Retiring the pain,
The rejection of who we are,
City buildings weighed on us,
We became one with the racism,
Had no outlet to talk about it,
Internalized oppression,
Smashing our fists on the ground,
Internalized oppression,
Sexual oppression,
Internalized oppression,
Internalized oppression,
Smoke in our lungs,
We became one with disassociation,
We became one with not knowing who we were,
We became one with genocide,
We became one with cutting our hair,
To disassociate,
We are no longer Native,
We became one with the daily genocidal dose,
From urban living,
A dose of haze,
A dose of particulate matter,
A dose of brick and mortar,
A dose of a bad taste in our mouths,
A dose of consumerism,
A dose of window storefronts,
And someone left a half empty there,
A dose of forget who you are,
As you are not Native,
Your hands reach across the land,
In hope of connections,
To be found,
To dismantle this urban Indian you have become,
To become one with who you are,
Proud to be Native,
To become one with being visibly Native.