Poem: My Coach, I Hope You Are Well

My coach,
I heard her peeing in the bathroom,
She was in the stall for awhile,
I was listening,

She was the only one to tell me,
That she had an eating disorder,
She ran competitively at a NCAA division 1 university,
I felt sad when she told me,

I was always very body positive,
In my teens,
And when she told me,
My heart went out to her,

She had to leave the university,
Retire from running,
Because she was ill,
The web of the eating disorder made its way around her,

She was a good Michigan high school runner too,
I remember seeing her name in the papers,
Someone I admired from a distance,
Literally,

The metal bathroom stall doors,
Cold tile,
She was in the stall a long time,
I knew why,

Drink lots of water,
Before the banquet dinner,
So she didn't have to eat,
She was not recovered,

I later ended up in her shoes,
Fast,
People wanted to catch me,
Except the eating disorder caught me,

I kept in touch with her,
Later I told her I battled an eating disorder,
She knew how collegiate athletics puts girls through the ringer,
To have them come out thin,

It did that to me too,
Cold,
Cold rooms,
I am shaking,

I understand now,
I hope you are well,
My coach.